A story about listening to your Self.
I never liked hair.
In fact I asked my mom if I could cut the shit off when I was 10. My hair wasn’t much to write home about. I didn’t see the point of it. Of course she refused but that longing always stayed with me. I just buried it because mom was in charge of my hair not me. Thank God Brandy made braids cool. That carried me through middle and high school. Thank you to my big sister for learning how to braid, and for not letting me look crazy all those years. She is a real one.
Life happened. Boys happened. I got DICKSTRACTED y’all. I forgot all about my personal desire not to have hair. It got lost with many of my other desires, as I became more concerned with how other people wanted to see me, as opposed to how I wanted to see myself. I stopped listening to me one request at a time. I what they call in the spiritual world “fell asleep”.
Fast forward to 2018. My Jesus year. The year the awakening was apparent to me. In September I quit my job, and began a healthy spiritual practice. I. started to hear my Self again. I could hear what God wanted for me loud and clear. I didn’t want hair, so why was it still on my head? So I cut the shit. I cut my hair off.
I don’t give a fuck what nobody think this is me. Take it or fucking leave it. I was finally doing what I truly wanted.
My haircut got mixed reviews and me quitting a well paying job wasn’t well received. I persisted. I gave zero fucks. It felt good to be me. That was the beginning of a practice I have developed called “Fuck that I’m choosing me.” A practice of putting my own face mask on first. A practice of honoring my own feelings, opinions, and inner most thoughts.
Quitting my job looked crazy to people, but according to my God I make more money doing what I love to do. Helping people realize that they know what’s best for their own lives. And though cutting hair may seem like a small thing it means the world in my evolution into who I am today. It is a reflection of my power to exercise choice in my own life when it comes to how I express myself.
I mean you can’t look at me and say that I didn’t truly make the right decision. I’m fly as fuck. Proof that I know what I am talking about. Proof that I said what I said. I cannot stress the importance of listening to and trusting yourself. Stay connected to God so that you always know that no matter what choice you make you’re making the right one.
God knows all things. Go inside and listen.
